With This Feeling in my core, please don't stay in my dreams!

Honestly speaking, I hate this place.
I go to you as my only escape.
I hold ties that were beat till they broke,
With you I heal, but on words I still choke..
Dont let this be a demented joke.

I did tell you I'd play pretend,
I never meant I was any good.
I'm hiding more than you see.
To not just crumple there on the floor,
It takes a lot from me. 
So sometimes I need fake laughter,
I really don't care that its not real.
Because If I do it loud enough,
It drowns your voice from my ears. 
And if I stare at the ground,
I don't have to see your eyes...
A brainiac of a girl you are,
You can see through this disguise.

This feeling thats in my core 
This feeling that is swimming inside me,
it is getting the best of me.
I've had this feeling for a short time,
but it feels like a long time.
The way you talk, bringing you down,
It's bringing me down, I'd like it if you stopped
It's strange, this feeling, its flowing through my body,
I love this feeling, I want it to continue it's course through my body.
Can I make it? Can I have it? May I have you?..
I'll keep you, save you, cherish you and love you! 

A man spent hollow and his sorrow

To become a man spent hollow.
The boy must laugh at his sorrow. 
My pain is my own, 
Have to make it my grace. 
Find strength in the dark and take the stake in my soul. 
So what if I've been dealt the worst hand? 
Play my bluff and make jokers of fortune. 
I'm an artist whose greatest work was the facade I painted. 
I'm an architect whose greatest monument was the walls I built. 
Every soldier has their protection, only a fool would be without. 
There's promise for me, deep behind a mind rife with doubt. 
I'm the chorus of a yet written ballad that's world famous. 
I'm the spark of a match that sets this tired city aflame. 
If I think I'll find peace, 
I'll Pack my bag, take sail on the seas. 
Leave this life never content with the tide, 
And set out to take this world in my stride...

I wont let the ink go dry, rather etch my story on my skin. 

I'll scribe about her Eyes of new hope like the sea 
Hair dark like midnight sky's 
Heart and soul full of desire 
how I found her company refreshing and new 
As we'd sit and talk until the morning hours. 
as I'd look into her and wonder if she knows...
She's a bitch above the bunch. 
I resist the urge to jump in. 
Afraid She would only use me and throw me away. 
I just patiently wait to watch you hit a mine!

My heart is honest, to live without passion would be sin.

Our Flirt

Cast me in dark shadows like a myth of figments
haunting
sequels to brush and blush in ecstasy?
 
In a fool's paradise
we could mock each other with sweet infatuation
and let the nectars flow.

She pulled me in
with silver tongue and ruby lips.

Seduced and tantalized
with bewitched  gestures of fancy indulgence
I flatter obscene desire?

I dived into the depth of her being,
and haven't resurfaced.
Infatuation bloomed, flowering this passion.
 
Let this adoration
arouse flagrant snugness with unquenched warmth and char,
Now Friendship is silent decay!
Tell me girl from the west, where the sun will ever set,
Would you love this with joy?

This Worthless Perfection

I live a starless life, Fragile and imperfect
Underneath rainy skies, Believed to be worthless
Unable to wake up from misery
Alone...
Unable to sleep and Drowning in our own screams with Tears that flow endlessly
Wishing tomorrow wouldn’t come
Bathed in self inflicted pain
Wanting to disappear far away
Hiding behind fakes smiles
Holding back over flowing sorrow
Reaching out for answers, for someone who understands us.
Someone to believe in, Since we can’t
believe in ourselves
Staring out the window, Wondering if there really is such a person

Who would actually care?
Hold me close? and always be
there?

To fill my starless sky with hopes and meaningful life
Scare away my fears, while wiping my tears
Becoming what life failed to be...
The only one to mean, everything